Elvisa

Azra posted the link to this blog on her FB:

http://metrobloggen.se/alltombosnienhercegovina/

I looked throught the pictures and felt so much pride within me. I've never been afraid to say I'm from Bosnia, I've never hid the fact that I'm muslim and I've never let anyone talk bad about MY country.
Yes, I live in Sweden and I'm very thankful to be doing that. But, I don't let that take away from my past. I would never say I'm swedish because I'm not and that would mean I'm not only lying to people around me but to myself as well.
Sure, I can admit, Bosnia is not a perfect contry, but neither is Sweden so I can't stand people dissing Bosnia and only talking good about Sweden. That infuriates me more than anything else.
I've chosen to see the good in both and that makes my life so much easier.
Also, lets not forget!!! There was a war raging in Bosnia not to long ago. ALL of US were the victims of something that most of us don't even know what it really was. Some may call me stupid but I honestly don't know more than one race killing the other, basically.
And even that is harh to say but that's what it was. Let's not make it something else and say it was this or that. Bottom line is, it was racial cleansing.
Why?
Who the fuck nows?
What did people think they were going to gain? And, most importantly, did they really think it was gonna work???
It makes me so sad that we, our generarion, is now suffering from the consequence of their actions.

BUT, not everyone is the same.
We need to stop judging each other. We need to get to know the person to say he or she is not a good person.
Trust me, I walk around my hometown in Bosnia thinking who might have done what. Our past and history is gonna haunt us forever! But, it's only gonna influence our choices if we let it.
I don't wanna be that person. I see the good in all of us, at least I want to.
Sometimes I do wonder how a ethnicity went from good to bad overnight.
But claim they didn't do it. 
We don't need an apology, it can't make the ones we lost come back. But at least acknowledge the fact that it did happen. Recognize the pain that this caused a lot of us.
I'm not trying to make ecxuses for anyone or take away pain, hurt and suffering but some of us are hurting more than others by the events of the early 90s.
What I'm really trying to say is that this has turned our generation into some strange bunch of people.
The older people want everything back to how it used to be, while WE, the younger generation, well, we either take a step back from everything that has anything to do with religion or we go all in. Sometimes even too much.
I respect everyone's choices. I made a choice myself that some might not understand BUT I'm not trying to force my choice on anyone! Therefore, I need people to stop forcing their on me.
If I don't wanna drink, I won't but then again if I do, I'm gonna do that.
These days the same religion is not the same religion. I have people telling me they don't celebrate New Years becuase it's not the muslim New Year. Well, that's fine! But do you actually celebrate the Muslim New Year then? My dad has been celebrating THIS new years since before me and he grew up in a muslim home. And he drinks. What does that mean? That is the true Bosnian muslim. It's been done this way since before me so who am I to try and change anything about him.
Also, when I say I don't drink people automatically think it's because I'm musilm.
No, that's not the reason at all. I JUST DO SEE THE POINT.
And before someone gets at me and tells me I do drink, yes I do. When I feel like it, but usually 4/5 times I don't.
I went three years, during high school, when everyone else was drinking without one sipp of alcohol. Why?
Because I felt like it.
And I've decided to not drink this whole year either. We're gonna start with a year and then we'll see how it goes. :D

All I want is for us all to be happy. I'm happy with the choices I've made in life, it has allowed me to feel free and proud.
I'm happy because I have the most amazing people around me and the best friends anyonce could ask for.
It took me a while to realize that no one is perfect and we all have flaws and they make us who we are.
Accept me for who and what I am and I'll do the same with you.

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